Toothpaste (aka Step 1)

I am a high school teacher and in my Conflict Resolution class, I have my students do this activity where they have to squeeze an entire tube of toothpaste into a cup. Then I ask them to put the toothpaste back into the tube while they all look at me as if I am insane. The point is that the toothpaste represents the words that we speak. Try as we might, once they are said we can't get them back and so we should always be careful to think before we speak. As much as I would love to, I can't take credit for this because it's something I found online; however, I can speak to its simple brilliance.

Lately I have been thinking a lot about this activity. Although the point is really to watch the words we say, I have realized that I have been watching them a little too closely. In fact, I have been afraid to squeeze out my toothpaste other than to a chosen few. After all, toothpaste is messy. Lately, my Higher Power has made me feel as if it is time to start squeezing because perhaps it could help someone.  So...here we go.

Someone I love very much is an addict in recovery.  Other than the death of my father, this is the most difficult thing I have faced in my life because his addiction made me an addict, too.  I became addicted to protecting him and taking on his responsibilities (which sometimes meant closing my eyes and pretending they didn't exist).  I felt so out of control and walked on, like a doormat.  I learned not to trust anyone because trust = pain.  As a coping mechanism I threw myself into my work because at least there I could pretend that I didn't feel as if I was slowly being eaten alive.
 
"Step 1: We admitted we were powerless over the addict-that our lives had become unmanageable."
I walked into my first Nar-Anon meeting on the hottest day of July and the facilitator handed me an ice cream bar.  I remember feeling so desperate, alone and tired.  Like the ice cream bar, this group of people brought a cool comfort to my uncomfortable soul.  As someone read this first step, I knew that my life was going to change for the better.  I would soon learn a new equation: Nar-Anon = hope.


"As we reach out for help, we become ready to reach out a helping hand and heart to those in need of Nar-Anon.  We understand.  We do recover.  Slowly, new persons emerge.  Change is taking place." ~Nar-Anon Family Groups


The Bangor Nar-Anon meets every Thursday night at 6 pm at the St. Francis Center on Center Street.

Narcan vs. Chemo

This has been circulating on social media lately and it is driving me crazy!  Comparing Narcan and chemotherapy makes zero sense; it is like comparing apples and oranges.  Narcan is an emergency life-saving medication that can reverse the effects of an overdose.  It is not a long-term treatment as is chemotherapy so to compare the two is absurd.  This misleading oversimplification almost makes it appear that the cost of chemotherapy could be covered by what is spent on Narcan, which is simply not the case. 

With over 33,000 opioid-related deaths a year in the U.S.¹ it is time for us as a society to become educated on addiction and end the stigma that surrounds it.  A good place to start is to watch this video which shows how addiction affects the brain and will literally take less than two minutes of your time. 

Then check out Lost: A Special Report that takes a look at 60 of the 650 overdose deaths in Maine in just the last two years.  You can also share and subscribe to this blog which I will use to connect with others who are working to end the stigma surrounding addiction.  I will also share my own experience as I work the steps as an "affected loved one" & Nar-Anon member. 

"Negative attitudes and ways of talking about substance misuse and substance use disorders can be entrenched, but is possible to change social attitudes. This has been done many times in the past: Cancer and HIV used to be surrounded by fear and judgment, now they are regarded by many as simply medical conditions. This has helped people become comfortable talking about their concerns with their doctors, widening access to prevention and treatment. By coming together as a society with the resolve to do so, it is similarly possible to change attitudes toward substance misuse and substance use disorders."²

¹Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Drug Overdose Death Data https://www.cdc.gov/drugoverdose/data/statedeaths.html

²Surgeon General's Report on Alcohol, Drugs, and Health: Executive Summary https://addiction.surgeongeneral.gov/executive-summary